Falling forward

Aven had been taking small baby steps with support, 2 weeks before his 1 year mark. He would hold onto the play yard panels, take one to three steps, before his knees give way and he would land on his bum.

A week after his 1st birthday, he would be wave his little arms up in the air, take 2-3 steps and then grab hold of the nearest support.

Unfortunately, I don’t have photos or videos of his small achievements.

People say motherhood is a humbling experience. I would like to add that it is a transformative experience too. As an adult, we have been conditioned to fear and to retreat into our little caves at the possibility of defeat. How many times have we said no even before we make our first attempt? Have we stopped celebrating our little success and growth in our pursuit towards our goal?

Watching Aven learn to walk is the most humbling and rewarding life lessons for me.

♥ I watched this boy tried to defy gravity and attempted to stand on his two legs which had not experienced his body weight before.

♥ I saw how he would land on his butt and giggled because he thought falling was a funny experience.

♥ He attempted his first few steps holding onto the fence of the play yard. I knew the steps were not easy for him as he was learning how to support his own weight.

♥ He fell many times. And at every fall, he would look back and see if he had progressed from where he originally started. He would then shrieked in delight. Pushed himself up and then forced himself to stand again. Sometimes, he would be exhausted from trying, he would sit down, tap his knees and grinned.

He would fall and shrieked in delight.

I know I have been trying to live my life as carefully as I can. I have been afraid to injure myself. The past wounds and scars reminded me of the pain. But they also carried with them my courage, strength and resilience.

When was the last time you fell with excitement and joy?

Watching his learning to walk process has taught me so much!

  1. To enjoy the process of trying
  2. To check in to see if I’m further than where I started off even when I fall
  3. To pick myself up again when I fall
  4. To try even if I’ve hurt myself
  5. To rest when I am exhausted

Thank you son. For being yourself and teaching me such valuable lesson with your own learning.


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